Thursday, September 20, 2012

A Mess

Ugh...It was a mess.

It started with Joe rolling up the BETA BUDDIES Book and kind of sitting on it.  He did not want the class to see his picture on the cover.

I think he looks CUTE here...

So, Joe and I presented Type 1 Diabetes to his class yesterday...

I think, well I know that I embarrassed Joe.  I left his school feeling pretty bad, sad, and mad.  Mad at myself for not choosing my words more carefully.  Disappointed in myself for still crying.  Six years into this life of managing diabetes and I still cry when I tell his classroom that what I want them to take away from my talk about diabetes is that Joe is a normal boy that can do anything that he sets his mind to.  Of course I did not say it eloquently like that.  I said something like "he likes to run and play just like each one of you...he has brown hair...he has brown eyes...and ..." (* could not speak as my eyes started stinging and I lost my composure a bit*)

Joe's teacher, thankfully, took mercy on me and got the class engaged in talking about all the sporting activities Joe participates in.  They talked about his sweating issue, which they all thought was due to diabetes.  I chimed in with I think Joe is just a "sweat"-er.

One child then asked how I knew to take Joe into the doctor when Joe was diagnosed.  I talked about the sippy cups full of water just to satiate Joe during short car rides to the grocery store.  I then said something about urine laden diapers.  Apparently, and I realize this is common sense, "sippy cup" and "diaper" and perhaps "urine" are taboo words when talking about your nine year old in front of their entire class.  I am sure the "sweat" coversation did not help matters either.  I suck.

Joe handled it with grace.  He pulled a "Reyna", by diffusing his embarrassment with humor.

I left his school heavy hearted, feeling like I let him down.  I think not having the book to focus my attention lead me down the path of insensitive bodily excrement talk and infantile product discussion.

Ruining Joe's day-in-the-life.

13 comments:

katy said...

I think you guys will laugh about this forever! (Once the initial shudders of diaper-shame subside.) For what it's worth, I still think you're the world's best mom.

luvleamum.com said...

*chuckling* I'm pretty sure this is the very reason the school stopped asking me to attend to talk to the kids about d! My current best discipline for my oldest boy is to threaten to attend his school in a "Sammy wuvs mumma" tshirt. He'll complete any chore or homework at the thought!

Cindy said...

Aw, I wish I could send you a hug, Reyna! I'm sure you did great and whatever embarrassment Joe felt will be minor and short-lived. He seems like a kid who would bounce back quickly. And considering how just incredibly awesome he is with his peers, I'm pretty sure they won't be holding any of this against him either. You both are just too wonderful. Love ya!

Scully said...

all in the name of the game.
I can picture Joe rolling his eyes. But he is kind of a shy little guy when it comes to the realities of D.

It'll all pass, I'm sure he's a popular kid!

NikDuck said...

Aww....I so feel for you Reyna! I think Joe will bounce back very quickly from this! It's so hard to find the right words when feeling so many emotions. I feel like I am such a non-feeling, insensitive, biotch when I have read the book to the class, it's like I am an actress just reading a book all matter of factly...it's what I have to do to not cry. The part about him being just like everyone else and to not be treated differently is what gets me too.

What is it about the word diaper??? It sends my kids into major laughing hysterics whenever they hear the word???!!

Anonymous said...

No, I don't think you messed up. I think, as the child gets older, they want to have more control over when and who to tell... just want to go to school like everybody else. At a certain point, the child no longer wants "the talk" to be given to the full class at the beginning of each year. I think Joe is reaching that milestone in his development, either this year or next. It's normal. And, as long as the teachers know, his friends know, the Gym teacher knows, as long as you have more than one responder for Emergency Glucagon other than the Nurse, it will be okay. He will be fine. I think it's wonderful you want to educate, to advocate. At some point your child may rebel and not want to keep advocating and educating at school. He does not want to tell the whole class, just certain selective friends. He is taking ownership... I think it's a good thing. Hard to let go of your little one, I know. He's really growing up fast.

Kelly said...

You really are a great MOM! I am sure you just being there in that classroom to explain "D" with Joe meant the world to him. xoxo

Wendy Rose said...

Oh my friend :( Joe will be okay...he'll roll his eyes and wonder why you're such a "MOM", but...one day...he'll remember those tears, and be thankful for a "MOM" like you.

Sarah said...

as long as nobody brings him a sippy cup or diaper tomorrow you're okay :)
I am sure it'll blow over, but sounds like he's getting so mature about his level of comfort in talking about t1d. The interesting thing for me is that he was so comfortable earlier, did he ask or seem super enthusiastic about you coming previous years? I only ask because Isaac is already really conservative about talking about diabetes, he doesn't like people to ask about his pump or why he's checking his BG. He gets a little red and starts hiding behind me if people take notice. Hmmm...

Reyna said...

Sarah...When Joe was in K-garten, he DID NOT want to share about "D"...I don't think he did when he was in preschool either. Once he was in first grade, he was eager to share. This year, I did ask him if he wanted to do it solo. He really wanted me to assist him with talking to his class this year. I doubt he'll want me next year. :)

Liz said...

Reyna, as my father always said to me....."As parents, it's our job to embarrass our children", so you can consider it a job well done! :)

Sara said...

LOL! You said urine!!!

(P.S. I'm nine)

shannon said...

aw, man. i hate leaving a social situation with my kid feeling like that.

in the earlier years, she was excited to share with her classmates about D, even standing up for a speech in front of the lower school and playing our fundraising video. these days she would never ever want to do that. although she is hatching a plan to talk to the head of middle school about having some sort of nov diabetes month promotion to match the oct breast cancer stuff.