Wednesday, February 7, 2018

The Mirror

As we walked side-by-side through the parking garage into the hospital yesterday, his 6' frame towering over me...he said 'I don't really even think about having diabetes except on Endo days and sometimes when I have to check a number.'



He then went onto say something that briefly caused my eyes to sting.  He said, 'it's weird, but when I look in the mirror...I don't see my POD anymore.  I don't see the CGM.  I just see me.' 

When Joe thinks of himself, he says diabetes doesn't even enter his definition of who he is.

The Endo appointment went well.  Joe continues to do the majority of his care.  He is an active high school freshman and manages to juggle school, being an athlete, and managing diabetes successfully.  His A1C was 7.  A fine number considering his growth and his independence.

He turns 15 at the end of April.  We discussed his drivers permit with his endocrinologist.  You see, driving with diabetes adds another element of risk to just the act of driving.  People with t1d need Medical Clearance Paperwork, in order to get their driver's permit or license.  When Joe starts to drive, he should check a blood glucose prior to driving and every hour if he is driving for more than an hour's time.  He should not drive unless his blood glucose is 90mg/dL, or higher.  Driving low is more dangerous than driving inebriated.

I'm not sure how I am doing with all of this.  Actually, that's a lie.  I do know how I've been doing.  I've been fairly anxious.  High school has been more of an adjustment for me...than for him; I think.  I have had to back off as a hands-on pancreas and trust that I have taught him well.  I have.  Can I just say, at this age, sometimes having that damn Dexcom is a blessing and a curse all in one.  Watching his blood sugar remotely can cause my mascara-fringed eyeballs to bulge outta their orbits when his number is tanking to the 40's, while he is at school or at a hockey practice.  There isn't a darn thing I can do to help him.  I watch.  I wait.  I worry, then I hope and I trust things will be OK.

A day-in-the-life update.


Anonymous said...

And you - and Joe - and your family, are all quite amazing. Really 15 and driving?
Colleen in NH

Misty said...


Katy said...

I love you guys. Joe’s amazing.

Francesco P. said...

Driving!! It's incredible how fast things go. Just yesterday we were driving to his violin lesson, as usual in a hurry, when I told my Giulio (he's ten now) "we need to bolus" (he was in the 200's). His hand went to the pump. After a while he tells me, deliberately: "I checked the numbers and bolused. 0.80 units." "Did you?" "Yes." Pause. "I did not ask you to confirm." (He knows he has to, always did). There he was, looking at me, anxious but proud, waiting. "0.80 is fine." So this is how it begins, I thought.

Aren't they amazing?

Lora said...

I hope Justin sees himself this way. They are all so much more than T1. Love you!